“Our times, our world needs monasteries.
We need saintly and dedicated monks and nuns.
Our times are thirsting for beauty - thirsting for Christ.”
Elder Gavriil Tsafos
Over Labor Day weekend, I had the blessing of participating in ROYA’s retreat at Sf. Dumitru Monastery in Middletown, NY seeking to satisfy just that thirst which Elder Gavriil described. In contrast to many other weekends spent at the monastery, the reason for our gathering was a 9 hour interactive workshop with Diac. Lec. Prof. Sorin Mihalache as part of his North American tour. This was especially compelling for those of us that had participated in his 2019 workshop on the cultivation of attention in Rochester, NY. During this workshop, one of the key concepts was that willpower consists of attention (vigilance), self-control (action), and perseverance in the face of discouragement, lack of motivation, and other obstacles. The theme of perseverance proved to be especially relevant to our group in the light of the previous day’s news that Fr. Sorin’s flight had been canceled, putting the entire retreat in jeopardy. God however, in His providence, provided the possibility for a timely flight after all, however postponing the workshop by a day and necessitating a new Saturday schedule.
Being at the monastery, we took advantage of the abundant daily prayer life, and began our first full day with participation in Holy Liturgy. Fr John Downie, a parish priest of St. Michael’s church in Southbridge, MA, was also present with us. After Liturgy and lunch, he spoke generously with us about his journey to Orthodoxy, time spent living in Romania and on the Holy Mountain, miracles of the saints that surround and accompany us every day, and the struggles of contemporary Orthodox youth. Our newly cleared schedule for the day also allowed us to visit one of Gheronda Ephraim’s monasteries nearby, that of St. Nektarios. After obtaining a blessing to visit, we arrived right on time for vespers, after which the relics of St. Nektarios and St. Pantelimon, St Nikiforos the Leper and others were brought out for us to venerate. Although the service was in Greek, the love and Grace tangibly present readily spoke to our hearts, and the way in which we were welcomed left a lasting impression on all of us. Upon our return to Sf. Dumitru, Pr. Staret Ieremia and the brothers welcomed us back “home” and to Vespers in our own language upon arrival.
On Sunday morning, our beloved speaker finally arrived. After Holy Liturgy and breakfast, we got started straightaway with the intensive workshop. It began with small groups of two in which we introduced ourselves, shared our future plans, an area in which we currently struggle to apply our willpower, and expectations for this workshop. Subsequently, we reconvened, and each person presented the thoughts of their partner to the group. The workshop was punctuated throughout by these small interactions, causing the time to pass without us even realizing it. For me, the first interaction was a highlight for me because it instantly created a more intimate atmosphere among the group of 20 that we were about to spend the next few hours with. The hours were filled with impactful and useful information. The most impactful conclusions for me were the different ways in which self-control can be cultivated. Most simply, it can be developed by being more attentive to daily tasks or relationships with others. Further improvement of self-control can be achieved by actively seeking out or accepting opportunities for discomfort. For example, this could be by intermittent fasting, postponing the glass of water that you desire, standing upright in church instead of slumping over or sitting, or taking cold showers. Another major component of expanding self-control is by resting mindfully. This discussion was particularly interesting because we split up into groups and created a list of activities we would choose for relaxation given each of the following three periods of time: 10 minutes, 2 hours, and 3 days. When we rejoined the group and shared our answers, the responses included watching movies, listening to music, or spending time on our phones. To my surprise, Deac. Sorin began to gradually refute each one of these answers, drawing our attention to the difference between what we enjoy and what actually relaxes us, and the biological process behind this difference. For example, certain stimuli such as phone usage trigger the sympathetic nervous system and prevent true rest, while others, such as reading, do not. Deep and true rest comes from silence, relaxing, reflecting, participating in outdoor activities, and sleeping immediately when you feel tired. Too many roles, responsibilities, and desires can lead to a weakened ability to control ourselves. I felt a moment of beautiful fulfillment and appreciation when the consensus for each group that shared what they would do with 3 free days was to retreat to a monastery. In the busyness of our lives, the place that we can all settle down and feel most rooted and rested are these spiritual havens of prayer and routine that bring us face to face with Christ and our true selves. These retreats are the fourth and final tool that we have available to temper our self-control - and therefore willpower - giving us a more conscious ability to master our lives with the end of drawing closer to Christ.
I recognize that this weekend would not have been the same without Deac. Sorin Mihalache, Sf. Dumitru monastery, St. Nektarios monastery, each individual participant that came from near and far, and the volunteers that had the crucial task of tending to all of us. I am immensely grateful for all of the love, work, and sacrifices that went into making this weekend so close to my heart and pray that God repays them all for this tenfold.
Participant
